Playing Your Game in 2026
2025 drew to a conspicuously quiet close. For the second year in a row, we stayed home for the holidays instead of forcing what might be the single most stressful activity you can think of – travelling with two toddlers.
Unfortunately, Julian picked up the flu, which eventually infected everyone in the house. Instead of exploring the city, playing in the snow, or date nights for the parents, the break was filled with a lot of screentime. A LOT. The TV worked overtime morning through night to keep the kids entertained and the parents sane.
Despite the flu or maybe because of it, there was a lot of time to rest or at least my definition of rest. I worked out. I cooked. I read. I SLEPT. It was good to have a few days just to do me. I hope everyone had some time to do you over the holidays as well.
Keeping Score
I have a bad habit of keeping score. It’s a byproduct of being naturally competitive and raised by Chinese immigrant parents who compared me to everyone else: behavior, grades, SAT scores, college rankings, etc. The more immediately quantifiable the better.
When Chinese parents get together, there will always be food, cards, and comparing their children’s achievements (or lack thereof). It’s one of their ways of showing that they are proud of their child. Regrettably, that show of pride rarely translates into a simple compliment about a job well done towards the child without it being attached to a comparison to someone else who is doing better.
Chinese parenting 101.
That tendency to keep score lingers into adulthood even as most of those quantifiable metrics fall away except for two: money (who makes more) and career (who has the shinier title at the more prestigious company).
Coming out of the break, my LinkedIn feed was inundated with posts from friends and colleagues about recent promotions of new jobs. After having left finance recently, my own professional career has been in a bit of a transition. That familiar feeling of keeping score bubbled up again, leading to tiny pangs of jealousy and FOMO.
When evaluated from the two lenses of money and career, leaving finance makes little sense. I would have a much clearer track towards promotion in finance than my current role. And as my mother never forgets to remind me, I would make much more money. By those two scoreboards, I was falling behind.
But there are trade-offs – more hours, more travel, less flexibility, less time with family. I likely would not have accomplished the two activities that brought the most overall fulfillment last year had I still stayed in finance – writing a children’s book and running my second marathon. In my current season of life, success is about balancing these non-work factors with my professional career. This wasn’t the case in my 20’s or early 30’s. But we change and how we measure success changes as well.
Everyone is playing by a different set of rules. You aren’t meant to play their game. You aren’t meant to live their life. Focus on the game you’re playing.
Playing a New Game in 2026
One habit I’ve gotten into over the past few years is setting aside time during the holidays to conduct an annual review. It’s been a good way to step back, reflect on the entire year, and set direction for the next.
I’ve found setting a laundry list of new goals and habits to start in the year isn’t all that effective. It’s hard to gauge what will resonate in a quarter let alone in an entire year, and most end up falling by the wayside.
Instead, I kept things simple for 2026. I used the annual review as an opportunity to remind myself which areas of life I need to focus on in 2026. These range from the big-ticket items: family, work, and health to the little things – sleeping / waking up on time, spending less time on social media / doomscrolling, being more focused and present, etc.
None of these are new. I’ve been working on them for years and likely will for the rest of my life. The new year shouldn’t be a starting point for new goals; it’s just a checkpoint for your existing ones.
I also pick one major project I want to devote most of my free time and energy to and will shape much of the year. This practice was inspired by the ancient Japanese purification ritual of the misogi. A misogi traditionally involving submerging yourself in cold water under a waterfall to cleanse your body, spirit, and mind. The modern, western adaptation is a single annual challenge that you set for yourself to where you have a 50/50 chance of success or failure.
The misogi to intended to truly challenge you and test your limits. It’s designed to change behavior, enforce discipline, and promote self-discovery.
This past year, my misogi was to run a marathon in under 3 hours 35 minutes. That would’ve been a 15-minute improvement from my previous marathon PR. I dedicated my entire year to running and largely gave up my other hobbies like Muay Thai and golf. I clocked 1,200+ miles through rain, snow, and summer heat. By far the most I ever ran in a calendar year. I ended up falling short of my goal but learned a lot about myself in the process. Coming out of that experience, I felt renewed and reenergized to take on life’s challenges. That’s what misogis are about.
For 2026, I’m taking a slightly different approach. Instead of a physical challenge, it’ll be a business one.
Tiffany and I are starting a business.
After years of talking about it, Tiffany and I finally pulled the trigger and signed a franchise agreement with The Little Gym to launch a location in Brooklyn in 2026.
Starting a business with two toddlers isn’t “ideal” timing. But we realized there would never be a perfect time. You have one life to live, and we didn’t want to look back regretting that we never took the leap. You have to start somewhere.
I saw a sign at a coffee shop the other day that said, “Live life like a board game. You roll the dice.”
Let’s roll the dice.